satisfaction.

How do you derive your happiness?

Is it from job satisfaction? Finding love that lasts? Or if you're less ambitious - settling for a partner and companion. It could be through spending time with your family or the ability to provide for your family. Perhaps it is through challenging yourself by doing something risky and difficult. Is it from buying that exclusive bag? Watching your investments grow and make money for you? Maybe it's status - getting that next promotion, chasing that dream.

I could be narrow-minded, but it seems this is highly correlated to the satisfaction of achieving or obtaining something, whether this is big or small.

I have always been fascinated by what makes people tick. What their inspirational or motivational driver is, what factors are at play when they uproot their lives or make drastic changes. Where is this all coming from? A few months ago, my god-sister announced she put in her resignation to move to Hong Kong (for a reason that is not for me to publish)...just like that. I could tell it was sudden but well thought out. I knew it was the right decision for her - it was written all over her face. I told her I admired the swiftness of her decision...how is she so certain it will work out? She told me, "Well to me, my job isn't that important right?" Of course - it seems so simple but sometimes I struggle to rank my priorities on a day-to-day basis let alone in my life.


Perhaps this continued fascination stems from not knowing what could do it for me. I love my job. I'm not wholly satisfied by it, but I enjoy it, it challenges me and I knock over little wins so I feel like I do accomplish things at work. I'm not fixated on finding love or that special someone to keep me company. I see my family, sometimes more often than I'd like. I'm relatively financially stable and I am certain I don't derive satisfaction from hierarchical ladder-climbing.

As comfortable as that sounds, I have a parallel fear that I am not achieving my potential and I won't end up making the difference that I am equipped to make. Both of my parents left their lives and loved ones and traveled to an unknown country to start a new life...as teenagers. My grandparents traveled from country and country, learned new languages and took huge risks to seek new opportunities and better quality of life for themselves and their children. Consequently, I have reaped those benefits too.

But what is so bad about underachievement if you're happy? After all, if it's not broken, don't fix it.

I am still unconvinced.